After a childhood spent doing nothing other than watching Wrestlemania, you are aware that the only way to ensure a winning super-villain is for you to appeal to the inherent racism of the modern political climate. Unfortunately; as a Generation Umlauter, you never bothered to watch the news, and have no idea who you are supposed to hate! This is a hugely detrimental over-sight in the future of your non-gender specific wrestling career, (remember, this is an Infinite Pathway to Adventure, meant to place the audience firmly in the driver's seat, we can't afford to ostracize any potential readers). After consulting a deck of prescient Pokemon cards, it becomes clear that the only viable option is to choose a character which has no specific ethnic origin, but somehow encapsulates the entirety of non-North American humanity.
You take a lovely jaunt to your local International department store with your Mom’s credit card where you find yourself an impressive array of ethnic paraphernalia. As you assemble your costume in front of the mirror, an overwhelming sense of purpose and destiny floods your senses. You begin to cry as you learn, after in-numerous attempts, how to wrap a turban around your head. The neck extender rings are significantly harder to secure in place, while the toe deforming baby shoes leave you surprisingly aroused in an excruciating pain sort of way. As you stare at this vision of pure, indeterminate ethnic glory before you, you realize you are left with only two options.

If you choose to take a video of yourself singing "We Are The World" and upload it to Youtube in hopes of pissing off nationalists with a viral video of universal love turn to page SHEEEYA RIGHT!

If you decide to masturbate while narcissistically staring at the vision of beauty before you in a state of delusion that you are really celebrating multi-culturalism turn to page WOW... REALLY?