Duct tape, and glue, and ingenuity, that's all you need! And cat like reflexes of course. You just need to be able to steal away into your neighbour's yard and pilfer like you've never pilfered before. And then wrap some extraneous tomatoes and cucumbers, with duct tape around the bare bones of your mother's decimated crops. The skeletons remain, empty barren reminders of your lovely Earth Angel apocalypse. You suit up in your blackest cat suit and take to committing yourself to a potent action film roll over the top fence. Being a wise and conniving veggie-burglar, you realize your next-door neighbour is far too conspicuous, so you tear through there, and on into the next yard. Small neighbour child Pepe unfortunately is playing there. He stops dribbling his ball to stare at you blankly, trying desperately to collate the insanity of the situation before him. You, motionless so as not to be spotted, in a full body black leotard, with hedge trimmers and green grocery bags hanging off each finger.
"Mommy! Is this what you mean by stranger danger?" Pepe inquires of his mother. She immediately gets the wrong idea and heads towards you with a rake. And you thought farming was supposed to be good simple work. Nobody told you it came with the perils of a rake wielding lunatic. Thankfully your Scandinavian Self-Defense class prepared you for just this eventuality. You back flip into a spruce tree, lithely passing through the branches, and using their supple resistance to catapult you back out towards her, feet first, batting the rake away with your heels, and coming down hard into her nose with the other foot. It was masterful. It was beautiful. Maybe your education wasn't so completely worthless after all? Maybe you'll even take the nice prison warden up on the offer of a free education while you serve out your manslaughter charges. Ah.... life is good!