You tumble through an altimeter of your mind, gradually rising upwards within your subconscious into the barometer of existential mental weather. (What a bunch of bullshit... seriously.... just tell me to shut up... please!) Eventually, you bla bla bla into an image of your scientifically minded father. He exists there, and here, within you without you, god.... you know the drill... you say "Pip-Pep... tha fuck dude?! THA FUCK!?" He stands and stares stoically.
"Serianusly! Tell me why the fuck you left Momsy!"
"Cause she's a fuckin' bitch dude!"
"Well ya... duh... I mean... I know that. But why get with her anyways then?"
"Because 20 odd years ago she was a hot piece of tail with a pussy that just couldn't quit! The shit she could make it do... mmmmm"
"Dad! Fuck! Shut up!"
"Hey, this is your sub-conscious kid. If that's what you want to hear, I got this guy Oedipus here you should meet...."
"Shut up Dad. Seriously, why did you leave me all those years ago?"
"You want to know? Really? Honestly? The full ass truth?"
"Yes Dad, it's all I've ever wanted."
"Oh my God...." he hides the next word underneath a cough "loser", then continues. "Okay... for real son, it was....", he then pauses for dramatic effect, because apparently this dream/hallucination decided it needed some filler, he gazes off into the distance where an enormous golden dragon, with long serpentine body slithering in infinite esses through the sky, fiery red sunset illuminating it's metallic sheen.
"Enough of the CGI bullshit dad! WHY?"
"Because of that fucking show you used to watch! That fucking Polkaroo! What a fucking ridiculous thing to foist upon the young and impressionable! Those childhood entertainers, what the hell is wrong with them? POLKAROO!" he emphasizes with an asshole dad aggressive and sardonic smile with faux ebullience in the voice, "You try to raise an intelligent child with an inquisitive mind, ready to learn and digest the world around them, and they are glued to that fucking idiot box with a fucking reject from down under who hopped out of a gay pride parade for the handicapped. POLKAROO! POLKAROO! POLKAROO ASSHOLE!" He shoves you, and you lose your footing. Startled, you awaken with a jolt as all falling dreams do, except this time you actually are falling, jostled from your place amongst the Earth angels, you land face first in the dirt on some of your neighbour child's backyard toys. Nice.