While you accept that despite the last 6 and a half years (roughly, trying not to alienate anyone’s imagination here) of pathetic facial hair growth, it is possible that with the correct amount of hard-core physical training in a garage full of sun-bleached 80’s nudie pin-up posters, you might possibly be able to scrounge enough testosterone out of your withered (or imaginary) testicles to finally grow a manly and intimidating lawyer style moustache to fully enrage the crowds of impotent legal victims; who wants to go through all that intensive working-out, when really your main interest is to focus on practicing your rage-inducing facial expressions in the mirror. You rush out to the local international department store and buy a stick on moustache. The closest you could find to the square (in all senses of the word) lawyer ‘stache you had envisioned is a curly jungle explorer type affair. You suppose it will have to do, as you grab a packet of Krazee glue to go along with it. You are more committed to the Kayfabe than any wrestler who came before. You will Krazee Glue your persona to your face and wear it proudly across the remainder of your days. You ARE….. wait…… what is your wrestler name anyways?